Back To Square One...

Well, I got a job, plan to apply to UC Davis next month and am under going diagnostic testing for my fertility issues......In a nutshell
I'm working at our BMW store on Fulton Ave in Sacramento. I'm an assistant to the service advisor's and its pretty fun. I don't have to deal with the relentless stress of being an advisor, I just help them with the relentless tasks of the job.
I'm applying to UC Davis in November for the Human Development program. If, for some reason that doesn't work out, there is a very good Child Development program at Sac. State. My plan is to take two, maybe three, classes a semester and continue to work.
After the last failed IVF cycle in June, I'm taking a break and we have decided to kind of start over. I want to have what ever test done to assist us in figuring out what the next step should be. If testing comes back and everything looks okay, we might opt for one more round of IVF. If the test come back not so good, we'll talk about using donor eggs. I think we have decided that adoption isn't for us. We have talked about what we might do if children are not in our future, and it would be tough but its all about turning a negative into a positive. And we have some really good ideas that would be a big positive!
It's all very up in the air at this point but we're doing really well considering the cards we have been dealt. We're gearing up for duck season and we're pretty excited. Of course Jeff is like a kid at Christmas time! I'm just excited cause I love being out there. The dogs are free to run, the trailer is tiny and so easy to keep clean, bon fire every night, quads to ride, fishing, shooting.....
My gosh! I guess I never grew out of my tom boy phase! ;)
So, I'll keep you all posted, and until next time......

Moving on

My new focus has been perfecting my resume and finding a job. I'm discovering that I'm not too sure if I really know how to job hunt, and I'm discovering just how difficult the job market is right now! I'm blessed to know a lot of people willing to help me though! I'm also starting to find out about applying to UC Davis. I already missed the deadline for the fall so I've got some time, I've never applied to a four year school but is seems time consuming. I guess I'll soon find out! It pretty exciting! But truly, I'm just so looking forward to working! I just need to find that job that will keep me nice and busy! So, that's it for now. Hopefully I'll post soon with fabulous job news!! ;o)

The end of one road

Yesterday we found out that my eggs are unable to produce a pregnancy. All of our embryos gradually expire after fertilization. Our options at this point are, using an egg donor, adoption or not having kids. None of these sound too good right now. We're going to take a break for a while. I'm going to concentrate on finding a job and getting back to work. Maybe in a couple years we'll reevaluate... Who knows what the future will hold!

postponed

As we reached upper Colfax on our way to Reno for the big day, the embryologist called and said they are not quite ready... Them my phone dropped the call. Ahg! So we finally touched bases and she said our embryos just need one more day to progress to where they want them to be. What ever that means. So we'll try again tomorrow! And it sounds like we'll have 4 or 5 embryos to choose from.
Till tomorrow~

Day 3; to freeze or not?

Dr. Foulk just called and told me that we have 18 embryos left out of the 25. 11 of them are not in the best condition and 7 are looking good. They base their condition on appearance and number of cells. The 11 that aren't so good only have 4 and 5 cells, the other 7 have 8 cells as would be expected at this stage. The embryolgist recommended we grow all 18 out to day 5, so that is what I opted to do. I plan on having three transferred on Monday and if there are any left we can freeze them at that point. But then if there are only 4 or 5 left on Monday and I use three, is it worth freezing 1 or 2? I guess we'll cross that bridge when we get to it. Till Monday people ;o)

The day after

Ok, out of the 40 eggs retrieved, 28 were good enough to fertilize. After 24 hours 25 out of the 28 are still kick'in! So, let's say half of those make it to day three, let's say 12. Do I freeze some at this point or grow all of them out to 5 day? I'm thinking this is my last chance so put all your eggs in one basket, so to speak, and grow all of them out to day 5. A day 5 transfer has the greatest success rate so why not put everything we've got towards the best chances!? We will have to see how things look at the day three update. Check back Saturday!

Drama!

On our way home from Reno this morning I noticed my bladder was way full! The pain was from my bladder not from the procedure! So, we stop in Colfax and I'm in tears at this point! I can't go! Not even a little bit! To make a long story short, Jeff drives me to my doctor in Roseville, actually Lincoln, and he Cath's me! While they were draining my over filled bladder, the nurse asks, "how much can a bladder hold?" The Doc says "oh 750-800 cc" guess how much was in my bladder! 800 cc's! My doc's in Reno just called to check on me and were very happy to hear I have pee'd on my own! So, the saga continues!

Egg retrieval went well

I'm still a little loopy and extremely soar! They got 40 eggs! Its a great number but not all of them will be usable. They will fertilize each of them by sticking one of Jeff's swimmers into each one and then they will call me tomorrow with a fert. Rate, or a survival rate. Then they will call me Saturday to give me an update and we will determine how many to freeze and how many to grow out to blastocycts. Then, on monday we head back up here for the transfer.

A day early, again!

I'm a day early for egg retrieval, just like last time. I'm headed home today and will come back on Wednesday for the retrieval. So, the embryo transfer will happen on Monday now. That's it for now, stay tuned!

The count down begins

After my ultra sound this morning it looks like I'll have lots more eggs than last time. We counted 18 on my right side ovary and 11 on the left. Its a 2D image so there are likely more behind the ones we saw. I'm going to guess we'll get about 34 this time (last time we got 26). Tomorrow they're going to do a blood test to see if I'm ready for egg retrieval (harvesting) early. In which case they'll harvest Wednesday and transfer Monday. Well, that's it for now, got to Lake Tahoe just in time for fantastic thunderstorms! So awesome!

Estradiol

Today I got routine blood work done to check my estradiol levels from the meds. This makes sure my estrogen levels aren't too high and I'm not getting hyper stimulated(ovaries going too much into over drive). Well as much as it feels like I am, I'm not. In comparison, last time around my levels were in the 700's. This time they're just above 1000. No need to worry until it gets over 3000 and as planned, I should be between 900-1200. Safari so goody, as my father would say! Appt sunday, stay tuned!

Here we go again!

So, I started the meds that kick my ovaries into over drive on Sun. May 24th. The bad news, it already hurts! The good news, we'll have lots of eggs to work with, in turn, lots of embryos = higher success rate. I'm doing acupuncture treatments this time around and I'm loving it! The egg retrieval or as I like to call it, the harvesting, will take place next week, tentatively scheduled for June 4th.last time I was ready a day early so I could be early again. The day of harvest I'll know how many eggs I produced. They are going to manually fertilize each egg and I'll get periodic reports as to the survival rate. They are going to grow the embryos out to 5 days to weed out the weak ones. At 5 days they're called blastocycts. On June 9th (if the harvest is not early) they will transfer back to my uterus. They say that they only transfer two because the success rate is higher with a blast. Transfer but I'm thinking I'll ask them to transfer three. We'll see how things go and what the Doc says. I'll be staying in tahoe May 31st through June 2nd for daily appointments. I'll be home on the 2nd and go back up for the harvest just for the procedure. I'll be home with my family receiving updates from the embryologists and return the day of transfer just for the day. After that I have three days of doing nothing and another 7 days of waiting! The worst part! That's it for now, I'll be in touch now that I have constant access to the internet. Third times a charm!

3rd time is a charm....right?

Another failed cycle! Even though the news was bad I got some more answers as to what is going on and why I'm not getting pregnant. The Doctor assures me he is extremely optimistic. He thinks that whatever insults I have had to my reproductive system in the past (I have had some sort of infection in the past I was unaware of until I started this infertility adventure) has effected my ovaries and in turn my eggs. The thaw process is a good indicator as to the strength of the embryos, and eggs. Sense my eggs have been exposed to infection at some point in the past and sense our embryos had a difficult time though the thaw process that tells us the problem is with my eggs. We have decided to try again and the Doctor said we are going to aim for more eggs, and in turn, more embryos to work with. Our hopes are high, thanks to my family; my optimism is lifted by the support of my hubby, hands down the best guy in the world, and my family and friends. As much as this whole situation...sucks, for lack of a better term, I'm incredibly thankful for the people in my life!!

2nd Embryo Transfer

Monday was the big day! I came up to Reno late Monday morning for my 3pm appointment. My friend Jaime Carter was my driver, sense I couldn't drive myself due to the medication they give you for the transfer. During the consult right before the transfer the doctor told me that all 4 embryos that I had frozen made it though the thaw process, which was unexpected. There was one embryo that was graded as "good" with 6 cells, one graded a little less that good with 6 cells and the other two were not in the best shape. They only had a few cells between them but the doctor said pregnancies have developed from embryos in this shape. So, we transferred all 4! Although, even with all 4, my chances are still only 40%. But, I'll take it!
I am staying up here in Sparks with Jaime so I'm not tempted to do something I'm not suppose to do. Doctors orders are not activity for three days, and limited activity until my first blood test next Tuesday. We decided to have Jeff stay home with our four legged furry kids instead of him just coming up for the hour the transfer took. It is really a quick process and painless, thank goodness!
Friday we are headed over to South Lake Tahoe for Jaime's batchlorette party, at lease I can be the sober driver for them! Whoopy! It will be fun though! I'll be home Sunday or Monday, not sure yet, just playing it by ear!
Stay tuned....

Round 2

The first cycle unfortunately didn't work. We found out on Monday. After speaking with my doctor he said it must have just been bad luck cause everything looked good. Thankfully, we have four frozen embryos! Doctor said it is likely that not all four will make it through the thawing process so my fear of quads was put to rest! I just hope that we have three or even two once the thaw process is complete.
I am in Reno now and have an appointment on Monday to start round two. We should be able to transfer the next set of embryos the week of March 16th (our anniversary is on the 19th, that has to be good luck!). So, that is all I know right now! Stay tuned...

Egg retrieval and Embryo Transfer

Well, after a traumatic series of fertility drug injections to make my ovaries engorged with eggs, they retrieved 26 mature eggs on Tuesday. They knocked me out for the procedure and thank goodness, I was in pain!! I got some great drugs pumped through my iv before they released me to have Jeff take me back to my girlfriends house to recover. I have been staying here in Sparks Nevada for the treatment and will stay until the embryo transfer. So, 24 hours after my girls and Jeff's boys were introduced we have 12 embryos marinating in the lab at the clinic. They fertilized naturally and didn't need any intervention from the embryologists. This was a huge relief to me cause now I know the problem isn't with my eggs. The next step is the embryo transfer on Friday at 4pm. I will consult with the Doctor and he will review how many embryos survived the three days and we will pick the healthiest two to transfer to my uterus. No, not 8! That is a whole other blog! after that we will know 10 days after transfer if it worked, but of course I'm sure it will! It's all about the positive thinking!!
Stay tuned...

One Step Closer

Today was surgery day! I had a uterine plop removed that was acting as an IUD and preventing attachment of an embryo. The next step is a Plan of care appointment. I will have an itinerary of my first and hopefully only in vetro cycle tomorrow. It is becoming real to me now and I am very excited about the next steps.
To be continued.....

Something to think about...

Most people close to me know about my struggles with infertility. Recently, I had a talk with someone who has strong beliefs about abortion and I had to make it clear how abortion laws greatly affect infertility treatments. No matter how you feel about abortion, please know that further restrictions on abortion can hinder infertility treatments available to people like me. I think everyone would agree that abortion is a very touchy topic, but if you think more in the light of reproductive rights, it is a much broader topic. Just something to think about!

CA Edu Code

"Education Code (EC) 51933 (Outside Source) specifies that school districts are not required to provide comprehensive sexual health education..."
(http://www.cde.ca.gov/ls/he/se/sexeducation.asp)
In addition, the state of California requires teachers to "emphasis abstinence" when teaching sex education. With these two stipulations it just seems that there is a huge potential for very important information to be left out.

"In accordance with EC Section 51933, in grades seven through twelve sex education classes shall also teach about:
o abstinence from sexual activity
o STDs, including their transmission, treatment, and prevention and information about the effectiveness and safety of all Food and Drug Administration (FDA) approved methods reducing the risk of contracting STDs
o the effectiveness and safety of all contraceptive methods approved by the FDA
o the California law allowing parents to surrender newborn babies to hospitals or other designated sites without legal penalty. "

Problem #1. Studies consistently show that the effectiveness rate of condom usage dramatically increases with education on how to properly use them. You cannot just hand out condoms and tell young people to use them, they need the know how.
Problem #2. I see nothing about peer pressure and dating relationships. Grades 7-12 is prime dating ages, why are we not teaching young people what kinds of behavior to look out for and be aware of? I know of so many high school relationships, including my own, that were abusive, manipulative and/or destructive.
to be continued......

Ethnographic study

So, I need to know what you thing, feel, believe about sex education and when is it appropriate to initiate "the talk". Specifically, what do you think about abstinence only education? Should parents be more involved in the classroom teaching practices on the subject? Would you volunteer/ participate in your child class? Do you have children? When did you or when will you approach the subject with your own kids? And, what subject matter did you cover? How open are the discussions about sex in your family? Talk to me....